Hello Internet.

Christmas has passed and now we're in that boring interim phase until New Years.

But oh my gosh. I have been obsessing (more than lately) over the newest episodes and I just have to tell you about Emma Approved.

The channel that uploads these videos are Pemberley Digital and they update Emma Approved twice a week, Monday and Thursday 9am PST.

So there were two episodes posted this week.

Episode 23, titled "Moment of Triumph" and it was, in my opinion, the highly anticipated episode. It was the holiday party. So much happened. A little bit of Elton's colors showed and Emma's slowly realizing that her plan's not working out the way she planned. Elton made things so awkward in this episode, in the beginning when he first came in he went for Emma's waist and then we see her awkwardly pull herself out of his grasp. Then when she tells him about Harriet being home sick Elton obviously doesn't care and is more concerned with having fun with Emma and meeting her dad. Which when he brought that up I was like: "You obviously want to meet him on a more personal basis, thinking you're in love with Emma and all that." 

The episode then progresses, Elton pretty much trying to be with Emma as much as possible and then later on Elton comes across as overbearing and he starts to show. Not just his politician personality, we get to see how he really is. Which I think is controlling. And his personality shows even more in the next episode.

Now before I put the next video up, I just want to address how absolutely heartbreaking Emma's face was at the end of the episode. You can totally see that she's finally seeing her plan is starting to split at the seams.

Onto the next episode...

Episode 24, titled "Vingt-et-un" which is "21" in French. Which I believe to reference how Senator Elton was supposed to be her "21 for 21." And if you watched this episode, you know how it turned out.

Not well.

I mean Emma Woodhouse is wearing sweats. You know that isn't good on any level. But still, despite the wall she hit in the last episode on the Senator front, she keeps on pushing. So naturally she wants to confront Elton and ask him directly indirectly about Harriet. And when she does Elton finally admits to being in love with Emma. And honestly, the sound that came out of my mouth most certainly was not of the human variety. And then because Emma doesn't return those affections and told him rather bluntly Elton blows up.

As what seems to be a prideful response, Elton essentially verbally attacks Emma solely because he didn't get the reaction he wanted when he admitted his love for her. And when Elton figures out that Emma planned for Harriet to be his perfect match he then attacks her competence. It was like I was personally insulted when he attacked Emma and especially when he insulted Harriet. There was a line in the episode when Emma says that Harriet is perfect for him and he replies with: "If I was running for student council, not for Congress."

I was personally affronted.

I mean yes Harriet is young, she's a recent college graduate. But to completely dismiss and almost belittle her like that? Clearly the Senator is used to getting what he wants and lashed out when things weren't going to plan.

Then he fired Emma? And stormed off?

What. A. Child.

And then she started to cry. I felt my heart broke.

I was hoping Knightley would walk in and console her and thankfully he did. He walked in, completely oblivious to the situation, but when he saw that her office was in a disarray and she was organizing, he immediately knew something was wrong. (Note: earlier in the episode, Emma admitted to Elton that she organizes when she's stressed out.) And then Emma admits that she's failed. And despite their disagreements over the entire Elton situation, Knightley didn't say anything. All he was focused on was consoling Emma while she cried on his shoulder.

I mean.... what?!

And then end episode.

And usually at the end of every episode, the last few seconds are full of links. The main ones are links to the previous and next episode and usually there's a little clip of the respective episodes. So naturally, I wanted to see the small clip of the next episode and do you know what I saw? There's not going to be a new episode for the whole of January. It's coming back in February 2014. Which when I saw 2014 I was like: "a whole year?!" But then I realized that's literally two months away and I that needed to reel in the dramatics.

Which in the context of the show makes total sense. I mean Emma's going through a very emotional time right now so it makes sense that she'd want to take a break from filming. But on one of the writer's/producer's tumblr, they mentioned that it's a production decision and that they want to regroup. Which I don't understand because the videos seem really well done and the acting is wonderful while we're on this topic.

I just don't know if I have that kind of patience. I mean I can barely handle the 3-day wait between Thursday and Monday episodes. Now I have to wait a whole month?

I'm just going to have to deal.

Merry Christmas!

Or happy holidays to those non-Christians. Or happy Tuesday to those that don't celebrate anything this time of the year.

But I have to be honest with you, it doesn't feel like Christmas. I don't know what's different. Maybe it's me and I just haven't been letting myself get into the holiday spirit this year. Though by that regard, I should be extremely happy and into the Christmas spirit.

If you read my last post, then you know that I let loose a huge can of worms and to my surprise and gratefulness, it turned out in my favor. If that's not cause for celebration, I don't know what it. I mean the past three years have been wrought with guilt and shame, yet I enjoyed the Christmas season then. But now, with everything out in the open I find myself a little bored and unhappy with the lack of spirit I have within myself.

It's weird.

So. It Happened.

I told them.

I mean I knew that I would have to tell them eventually, but I never really thought about when it would happen. And it happened pretty organically. The main reason why I didn't tell them sooner though is because I didn't know when or how would be best to bring it up to them. I didn't want to ruin the day with telling them about my absolute failure as a college student and I also didn't know how to even begin that conversation.

"So my life sucks. Can't be an engineer anymore. What's for dinner?"

...or....

"How was my day? Well, I just learned that all my efforts over the summer and this semester were all for naught. I can't be an engineer thanks to the asshole engineering dean. How was yours?" 

I mean while that may work out nicely in my head, I have a feeling that it wouldn't pan out the same exact way in real life.

I am glad they know now. It's definitely been quite the cross to bear these past few weeks. And now I feel relieved. I can honestly talk about how my classes are going, and they know about my being booted from the Honors College. Though honestly, I can get back into the Honors College, as long as I bring my GPA back up to a 3.0. I did lie a little bit about my GPA. I told them it was a 2.9, when really it's around a 2.6/2.7. I mean it's not that big of a stretch. But still. It's a lie.

I know no college major is ever going to be easy though. I recognize that fact. But still.

Although apparently I was a little premature with emailing Laura about my taking a semester off.

Now that they know about my struggles with engineering, they told me that I can pick whatever major I want to take. My struggles were all for nothing because apparently they would've been ok with whatever major I wanted. And now I'm frustrated with myself because then I could've chosen to be a psychology major to begin with and I'd have graduated by now. Because you know I'd want to be that bad bitch that graduates college in less than four years. All those science and math courses I took for no reason. All that struggling and crying I did for nothing.

But I do feel better. About college. My future. Everything.

Now I get to have a major that requires classes that interest me. That's exciting! And a first!

I've always been the friend that people talk to their problems with and now it's a possibility that I'll end up getting paid for it? I think that's something I can get behind.

I may get my happily ever after after all. 

Here's to hoping that these next few years will make me happier and give me a sense of purpose.

Thanks Kenzi. I may just do that. 

Happy Holidays!

Hi. Me Again.

It's been a while.

And I have lots to tell you.

I've started watching a few new shows. And I'm obsessed. Although, one show I'm kind of boycotting until my OTP get back together.

Note: I'm not good at being vague, so there's going to be a lot of spoilers. So if you're not into that, I highly suggest you not read ahead...

Anyway. Show #1.

Yes.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

It's a show with supernatural characters. Now, I've seen vampires, werewolves, zombies (though I haven't watched any shows on this, creep me out), ghosts, and the like.

So this show has all those, as long as a few new ones. But the main character Bo is a succubus.

A succubus!

How cool is that. She feeds from sexual energy.

Um, yes please. And where do I sign up?

And not only that, but there's a love triangle. Now, I know what you're about to say, that's nothing new, most shows nowadays have more than one love interest. But wait!

The two love interests are of different genders.

Now, usually this is where I'd describe the characters, but that's not possible without injecting my personal opinions into the description. And because this is a show with supernatural characters, they have histories. Ergo, I'm using the interweb to help me.

BO is a succubus, she's unaligned, which coincidently is the what makes her so interesting to all parties involved.

The following information is from Lost Girl Wiki:

ARC: "Bo is a bisexual Succubus raised by human parents who adopted her as an infant. During her first sexual experience, she involuntarily killed her high school boyfriend by draining him of his life energy. Not knowing what she had done and why it had happened, Bo ran away from home, living a life without friends or family, and moving from place to place, changing identities each time she killed again.  It was not until she was discovered by the Fae, and helped by the Light Fae's human doctor and scientist, that she finally learned what she was and how to control her chi-draining powers."

PERSONALITY: "Bo has one foot in each of two worlds: the Fae and the Human. Bo is fiercely independent and chooses not to subjugate herself to either the Light Fae or Dark Fae, and frequently disregards the rules of the Fae world in order to do things her own way. Despite being independent, she has shown great loyalty to her friends, frequently risking her life to help them. Having suffered verbal and religious conservative abuse from her adoptive parents, Bo had a great deal of resentment and guilt towards them. Before making peace with her adoptive mother, Mary, she confessed that her mother's cruel words about her being "a monster" – after Bo sought her help and support when she caused Kyle's death – often echoed inside her head. Because she grew up among humans, Bo does not regard them as inferior beings as most other Fae do, and prefers to live among them while still keeping her true nature hidden. Due to her succubus species Bo is an extremely sexual being, not only needing sex to feed and survive but also to heal. Since learning how to control her chi-drawing powers, Bo has been able to enjoy sex freely without fear of killing a sexual partner."

LAUREN is a human doctor who's "owned" by the Ash, a.k.a. the light Fae.

The following information is from Lost Girl Wiki:

ARC: "Despite being human, Lauren's position earns her the respect of the Light Fae. She was seduced by Bo during their first meeting and has since fallen in love with her. A scientist with specialization in genetics and cryptozoology, she has extensive knowledge of the different species of Fae and their abilities, and finds the sphere of human medical science mundane by comparison. In the first season, she helped Bo learn how to control her chi and sexual energy feeding. In the second season, after The Ash who convinced her to serve him and the Light Fae was left in a comatose state from being critically wounded in a suicide bombing arranged by Aife, Lauren was passed on to Lachlan, the new Ash, as 'chattel.'"

DYSON is a light fae wolf-shifter.

Like I said before, I'm using an internet source for character descriptions so it's unbiased.

The following information is from Lost Girl Wiki:

ARC: "Dyson works in the human world as a homicide police detective in the 39th Division Homicide Squad. Though at first glance he appears middle-aged, he was born centuries before the events portrayed in the show and is actually 1,500 years old. He spent centuries in Ireland serving the Laignach Faelad wolf-shifter King of Ailech with his best friend, Stefan. In terms of shifter tradition, warriors like Dyson fearlessly and unquestioningly believed in total loyalty to their King. This changed when the King betrayed his wolf pack and had his best friend, Stefan, killed to take his wife, Ciara, for himself. After this, Dyson left his pack for good, becoming, in effect, a lone wolf." 

PERSONALITY: "Dyson is often short tempered and easily aggravated. He is also fearlessly and unquestioningly loyal to his friends and displays a certain respect for rules and the law. However, he shows willingness to bend rules in order to serve his friends, particularly Bo. Centuries ago, when Dyson was part of a wolf pack, he believed in total loyalty to the pack's king. This only changed when his king betrayed and had his best friend, Stefan, killed to acquire Stefan's wife, Ciara. After this, Dyson left the pack for good, becoming, in effect, a lone wolf. This might explain why Dyson sometimes gives the impression of being 'cold'."

Now. Time for my opinion. 

I am without a doubt, 100%, fully, wholeheartedly, emphatically and COMPLETELY...

This needs to be a shirt. Pronto.

I'm in love. Dyson is just perfect. First episode I already picked a team, and three seasons later, I'm still staunchly Team Dyson. I love for moments between these two. Whether it's sexual, personal, or just playful banter, I revel in those moments and my heart bursts with feels. 

Now most shows have cute ship names for all the couples on the show. Lauren and Bo are "Doccubus" for "doctor" and "succubus." Kitchy, I know. Although for Dyson, I've only ever seen/read "Team Dyson." But on tumblr, I saw "Dogubus." I guess dog is synonymous with wolf, but I feel like that's a bit derogatory, so I don't think Dyson would like that very much. Ergo, I'm sticking with "Team Dyson." 

I want a t-shirt with that image above. I would wear that with pride. 

As for Doccubus, I don't like them together. Do I have a reason why? No. 

I like the fact that they have a same-sex relationship in the show and that they ("they" being the writers) don't make a big deal out of it (coughGLEEcough). I was originally unbiased. Yes, I had a preference for Dyson... 

I mean... Would you kick that out of your bed?  

But I didn't mind the Lauren/Bo flirtations. But then it happened. The Ash wanted Bo distracted and told Lauren to do "what she had to do" to keep Bo occupied. So, Lauren being the loyal light chattel did what she had to do. She went to bed with Bo. And poor Bo. She was into Lauren, she had feelings for her. And there's Lauren, capitalizing on Bo's feelings. How cold. And then when Bo found out? You could tell she was hurt. And me being the invested viewer, I was hurt too. After that, my trust in Lauren dropped, practically disintegrated. I just couldn't find myself to trust her, therefore I don't like her anymore. That just solidified my love for Dyson. 

I mean don't get me wrong, Dyson had his douche-y moments. But I mean the majority of those moments happened after the Norn took his love for Bo away, so it wasn't totally his fault. And then when he (actually Kenzi did that) got his love back, those douche-y moments disappeared. And now, apparently Bo unknowingly pledged to the dark fae. After her and Dyson sexed it up in the ring, a scene that got me so excited and happy I was literally clapping and squealing in my seat. Can't these two catch a break? I mean I just want them to be happy and together. Is that too much to ask for?  

This adequately represents my struggles while watching this incredibly addicting show...

I should switch gears before I become visibly upset. 

Show #2. 

I didn't really purposefully look for this show. I had just finished watching the three seasons of Lost Girl and the fourth season hadn't premiered yet, so I was in limbo, waiting. And at the rate my obsession was going (I started watching any and ALL videos pertaining to Lost Girl) I knew that I needed to watch something, anything to get my mind off the show (read: Dyson/Bo). 

Now for whatever reason I remembered this show or at the very least the title back when it first came out, so naturally I looked up the season 1 promo, to see the general gist of the show, if it interested me. 

And this is what I found. 

The longest trailer ever. I almost didn't watch the show. I thought the promo was of the season. Like she starts off with everyone hating her, then in a moment of true teamwork, they realize that they each have a part to play and that she does belong in town. But then I watched the first episode. The promo pretty much summed up the entire first episode, save for a few one-liners. 

It's a cute show. I was entertained. 

And you know how with most shows, there's a few love interests, to keep the show going, viewers interested and all that jazz. Well this show's no different. 

So there I was, watching the first episode, and Zoe meets the first guy, a man by the name of George Tucker.

Gorgeous, southern gentleman.
Nothing to shake a stick at.

So naturally, in my head I'm all ready to start my obsession over a new couple. 

Then they introduce another guy, by the name of Wade Kinsella. 

Hot blonde, guitarist, bad boy with a heart.
Yum. 

I though that they'd be friends, you know someone to have Zoe's back. I thought, ok, this is nice, progression, fine. 

Then Zoe gets drunk, goes for a walk and Wade finds her and does that 2 mph drive next to her that all guys seem to be so good at. Then they proceeded to have a hot make-out session. I blushed. But then I remembered George and I got indignant. And then we find out that George is engaged! 

The blows just kept on coming. Which was to be expected because it's a CW show. And what would a CW show be without drama. 

Now I'm not the kind of girl to step on other girl's toes. So I backed off of George. I figured that there would be a love interest introduced later on. Lo and behold, Wade steps up. 


The banter increases and the sexual innuendos continue. And then they kiss! Again! 

How can you deny that these two belong together after a kiss like that?!

 But these two run so hot and cold my soft heart couldn't take it. I'm clearly not one for any type of angst. But then as the season went on Wade's feelings became a little more obvious and Zoe stayed completely oblivious. It frustrated me to no end. 

And then when Zoe was made aware of Wade's feelings, she pushed them aside because she was stuck on George. I wanted to shake that girl. Here's a guy that's gorgeous and so completely into her and she's not willing to give it a shot because she pictures herself with someone like George. Grr. 

This is why I shouldn't marathon shows. These two shows are the perfect examples. When I find a new show, usually there's a few seasons out already, so I start at the beginning, naturally. But when that happens, I'm so quick to form attachments, especially to couples. I spend a lot of my time invested in a TV relationship. I'm positive this isn't good for my health. And when I love a couple, that rarely ever changes. In fact, it usually only gets stronger as time passes. 

Case in point. And at this scene,
I literally felt my heart fill with feels.

But back to Hart of Dixie. Wade and Zoe broke up. And I'm currently boycotting the show until I hear/read that they're back together. So there's that. 

Next up on my new obsessions isn't a TV show. It's a web series. 

I love everything Austen so naturally my curiosity got the best of me. I loved the Lizzie Bennet Diaries. Dizzie got my heart all a flutter. So when I heard that they were adapting Emma I wanted to watch it. And so far, I'm not disappointed. We're only 21 episodes in, and LBD had 100 episodes, so if they're doing the same, we've still got a long way to go. I have read the book, so I know what's going to happen and they're moving pretty quickly along. Also since the book was only in Emma's POV we were limited to what we were exposed to, but in this web series, you get to see so much more. They're always cast so beautifully, and I mean literally. 

L > R: Mr. Knightley, Emma, Senator Elton, Harriet, George, Mr. Weston(?), Annie Weston

Aren't they a gorgeous bunch? 

If you've read the book, you know what happens. Knightley and Emma are meant to be, Mr. Elton is a total ass and Harriet is lost. And it's even more obvious in the web series. Knightley and Emma are so cute together. And when they brought in Mr. Elton? Ah! His infatuation is completely transparent and I find myself completely frustrated with Emma's obliviousness. Oh and in one episode Emma mentions Knightley's ex and I have a sneaking suspicion that it's going to be Jane Fairfax. In both the book and this series, Emma clearly doesn't like Jane, who if I remember correctly is supposed to mirror Emma in looks and accomplishments. 

I'd insert a video here, but there's 21 episodes and I'm not about that life, so instead I'll insert a link here: EmmaApproved Playlist  

Now it's neared half-past midnight, so I best be off to bed if I have any hope of getting up at a reasonable hour tomorrow morning to study. 

If only I had my own personal Wade to put me to bed... sigh.

I'd say this was a successful post.  

Also, note that I didn't feel like rereading this post. So if there's anything amiss... Fix it in your head.